Offing yourself.

I've been thinking a lot about suicide lately. Not my own life, I have no reason to kill myself. But suicide in general, the act, the reason, why someone would feel the need to take their own life to "escape" all the pain.

Specifically though I've been thinking a lot about the method's people choose. Hanging, overdose, jumping off of bridges, all things that, in the physical sense, affect only the person killing themselves. To me, while the act of suicide is not acceptable, at least you are not injuring someone else.

What really gets me though is the people who are so angry at the world, or a specific person or group of persons, that they would take their own life and the lives of those around them, whether its a murder suicide, a suicide bomber, or a school shooting. How many times have you heard about those in the news lately?

Recently a friend of mine that I have grown distant from experienced a loss of two of her friends when a drunk driver hit their car head on driving on the wrong side of the 5 freeway. Reports were mixed up for a while as to what happened, and everyone at first concluded that it was a drunk driver who hit the car, killing 2 of the 4 passengers and injuring the remaining 2, in addition to killing himself in the process.

2 young ladies dead, 2 more people in critical condition, all by the results of one drunk driver. You could write it off like that. It would make a good story for drivers ed. "Don't drink and drive."

But the thing that makes this even worse is that they found a suicide note (not sure where, probably in the car) of the drunk driver. He apparently got drunk, decided he was going to off himself, wrote the note, and drove down the freeway looking to slam into anyone he could once he got up to speed.

So heres where I get into my issue of methods. Like I said, I don't agree with suicide, but I at least respect that most people have the decency to kill themselves and not someone else. But here we have someone so angry at the world, so horribly depressed with his own life, that he felt it was a good idea to ruin the lives of, potentially, 4 more people.

Now here is where things get really heart breaking. In this case, 2 girls died, to two lives are ruined. But those girls have parents, so 4 more lives are ruined. Siblings? Grandparents? The lives affected by death are not just the lives of the dead, but the lives of those around them as well.

And what if it had been another car? Something larger? Most SUV's nowadays seat at least 5 people, my grandma's Odyssey seats 7. What if he had nailed something that big with 7 people who were all friends, not related to each other. Each with a mother and a father, perhaps one or two siblings. 7 people + 14 parents + siblings + grandparents + friends + children? You're looking at a whole lot of fucking upset people who's lives will be altered forever.

All because one drunk asshole had to go and kill himself in a car, instead of with a bullet to the brain, or even a cold nap at the foot of a tall building.

Its sickening. Absolutely sickening. I don't even know the two girls who were killed, and I still feel awful.